We had a pleasant flight back to Denmark - and this time would be the first time that neither my mum or dad were there to greet us on arrival. Laine and I didn't speak much about it, but I was very much aware that it was a time with many memories surfacing to a new reality. The last time we had been in Denmark together was in 2002, when mum celebrated her 90th birthday, and for that special occasion, we had brought Steen, Karina and Mikaila with us.
On arrival, Josep and Laraine took a taxi while Birgith and I waited for Lisa, who very kindly had offered to meet us in the airport. It didn't take long before we all were gathered in Valby, surrounded by t
One of the first things we both wanted to do was to go to the cemetery and visit the grave of mum and dad. (Dad's urn had been moved to the Nielsen Family Grave (mum's family) since our last visit and before mum's passing). Even though it has been many years since last visiting this grave, I was pretty sure I could find it, and off we went. We bought some lovely flowers and walked down a small lane to the grave and just stood there, allowing the loss, the pain and the memories to just be and maybe realising for the first time for me what the loss of one's parents really means. We walked slowly away and found a bench near a small lake near the grave and just sat there collecting our thoughts and I suppose ourselves. It is not very often I feel or even think about that I live 20,000 kilometers from my family in Denmark - but I must admit when family members or friends die, I can feel very isolated and a million miles from home, not really able to become part of the process of dying or the grief associated with the loss. Hence this visit was very important for both Laraine and me and as always she is my support and my rock.
Wednesday, we were of to visit our very good friends and one of my old colleagues from my teaching days in Denmark, Verner and and his wife, Zanne. Laine and Zanne have a very good relationship and even though they only see each other every few years, thier friendship is very strong. They were actually in Australia a couple of years ago and love to visit Oz. Visiting them is always high on the agenda whenever we are in Denmark and something we both real look forward to. They live north from Copenhagen, close to a wonderful forest and lake with a garden to die for. Verner's love is his hot-house, where he grows his tomatoes, grapes and many cuttings for the garden, while Zanne's
domain is the veggie patch, which is surrounded with wonderful flowering herbs, creating interest as well as beauty. Even though the day was a bit cool and cloudy and the rain never far away, they took us along Strandvejen which isthe coast road leading from Copenhagen to Helsingor (Kronborg and Hamlet) along the houses of the rich and famous,with a wonderful view across the Oresound to Sweden. We were treated to a lunch at a restaurant called Hammermill - which used to be a factory making the gunbarrels, used in many previous wars. It was quaint little place hidden in the woods with the old and now dis-used waterwheels which use to drive the bellows for the smith's fire. Enough of that bit of history - the important part was that Verner got us some draft beer which we enjoyed with a few pieces of rye bread with delicious pickeled herrings - more Danish you will never find. As we left, I all of a sudden saw this black snake and wondered why someone would have left a plastic snake there. However the little bugger all of a sudden began to move and Laraine nearly had a fit. There are only two kinds of snakes in Denmark and this likely was the non-poisonous one - clearly recognizable by two bright yellow marks on its neck. However it was quite a moment for both of us. There are very few Danes who will ever experience this - weren't we lucky? On the way home we went to Fredensborg Castle and saw Prince Frederik and Princess Mary's residence, which is not in the castle proper, but a building adjacent to it. Even though the building was guarded by the Royal Guards,we knew the couple were not in residence as the Danish flag (Dannebrog) wasn't flying. (I believe Mary in fact was in Tasmania, follwing her visit to the Olympic Games in China). When I told people in Denmark that the tabloids in Australia often gave Mary a hard time, no one could understand why as everyone here seems to both like and respect her. We returned home and Zanne then cooked us a lovely evening meal - marinated salmon with red peppers followed by a delicious calf casserole with fresh vegetables. A really love meal which was enjoyed by all.
The folowing evening Birgith and Joseph had bought tickets for everyone to see the musical 'Chicago' - an evening we all really enjoyed. At home it is one of the cds we often play - especially when Karina is visiting and we all perform various parts (my part is always Mr.
Cellophane - maybe because there are not too many high notes and dance steps). However knowing the words to the songs definitely helped Laraine to follow the Danish lyrics and we were most impressed by the Danish lead singers and dancers. At the interval I did the right thing and went to the bar and ordered a couple beers for Joseph and I and a couple of glasses of champagne for the girls. I was informed that they didn't sell champagne in glasses but I could buy a half bottle, to which I said yes. When the bill came, I almost had a fit (of course the man of the world I am, didn't show it) as the champagne was 350 kroner (almost 90 Aus dollars). I had forgotten that champagne in Europe is French champagne and not the Seaview kind - such is life in the fast lane. Because it was the interval break, Laine didn't have time to finish hers and left at least half a glass on the bar. However, we all had a great evening and thoroughly enjoyed the show.
As you can gather while in Denmark we never stop to catch our breath and the next day was
Lisa's turn (my eldest niece), who recently had moved into a new, beautiful apartment. Lisa knowing my handyman skills (don't laugh Bruno) presented me with a huge hammer drill and asked me if I could hang a few pictures around the place. Believe it or not I managed to use this huge drill and only make some small holes and everyone was happy - especially me, as my reputation as a handyman had remained intact - at least in Denmark. I won't tell you what we had for dinner, as Laraine just informed me, that writing that is sooooooo Danish. So you just have to guess! (Atlantic Salmon - don't tell anybody). After dinner, we watched Denmarks version of Dancing with the Stars and one of the contestants was the Prime Minister's wife, Anna-Metta Rasmussen).
Saturday I really had looked forward to as I was going to be together with all my old classmates as we celebrated our 45th anniversary since leaving school in 1963. My classmates have met every single year since then (and even met when I have been in Denmark) and it is quite a special group of friends. We all met at my old school for coffee and breakfast, followed by a walk in the old neighbourhood, which looked so small compared to our childhood memory - the street where
I grew up, the park we all played in, the local pubs where some of the boys sometimes had to fetch their dads when they forgot the time of the day (or night) - and it seems that pubs survive as they all are still there. We then did something very Danish - (I know everyone in Australia will find this absurb) we visited the local cemetery and took a tour finding all the old famous graves - H.C.Andersen, Soren Kirkegaard, Niels Bohr and many more. Because we grew up in Norrebro - one of the poorest parts of Copenhagen, all living in small flats with no hot water, no bathrooms and only a small concrete backyard - open spaces became very important for all of us and yes - the cemetery became an escape for all of us - hence the visit. I don't want you to think that I am a poor morbid soul, but Denmark is probably the country in the world where cemetries are parks with wonderful lakes, flora and lawns and very different to other countries where they can be places which are not well looked after and closed in. We then went back to the school for more coffee and then it was playtime (can you believe you are reading this?) - we all ventured to the school year and played all our old childhood games (it reminded me of a museum which had become alive). Imagine twenty 62 year old women and men playing hopscotch and attempting the good old hula-hula ring - not a pretty sight but lots of fun. We ended the evening in a Chinese restaurant and everyone was looking forward to meeting number 46 on the last Saturday in January 2009.
The eating feast continued on the Sunday, as we were going to visit two of my cousins, Bent (the oldest in the family now) and his wife Annelise and Lya and her husband Jorn. When only catching up with family and friends every so often, these visits become very important and the sharing of
family stories like - do you remember... - a great feature of these occasions. I found that I hear new stories and anecdotes at every such visit. Lya has made some important inroads into our family history and it was really interesting to speak about her findings, which go back to 1705. Annelise and Bent put on 'det store kolde bord' which definitely is a Danish invention, consisting of marinated herrings with an ice cold akvavit or snaps, followed by a number of small warm tidbits, such as pork medalions, roasted loin of pork or Danish meatballs (Frikadeller), followed again by cold cuts of meats, cheese and fruit. Not bad and definitely always an occasion to be remembered.
Week two all of a sudden appeared and may I say, far too quickly for my likeing. However I had made arragements with the catholic schools I was going to visit during my time in Denmark and the first was on this Monday afternnoon. and the other on Wednesday. Rygaards Skole has both a Danish as well as an International department and is one of the oldest Catholic as well as
largest school in Denmark, whith an overall school population of almost 800 pupils. The other Catholic school I had arranged to visit was Sankt Knud Lavard school - a small Catholic school near Lyngby, with a school, population of just 140 pupils. I have decided to write about these visits in a separate chapter of this blog, as I intend to submit my findings and reflections as part of a report to the Catholic Education Office in Melbourne. However, I can say that despite beeing 20,000 kilometers apart, it is quite interesting that most of the issues we face, whether the schools are in Denmark or in Australia, are quite similar, even though I feel Australian schools generally have come much further in regard to the paedagogy we use in our classrooms. I was welcomed warmly by the two Principals, Charles Dalton and Christi Bonde, who both spent many hours with me, showing me around the schools and discussing a great variety of issues associated with education and readily sharing and listening to each other. It was a great priviledge to vist the schools and be part of their day for just a little while.
Wednesday night was a wonderful time spent with my cousin John and his wife, Judith. They
had just returned from a trip through France and Spain on their BMW "supa dupa" motor bike. We were so glad to be able to catch up with them and Laine cooked a wonderful Lasagna and once again, Josep provided us with some wonderful wine. Every time you have a meal with family or friends in Denmark, it is a wonderful occasion and Birgith once again presented a beautifully prepared table which set the scene for fine wining and dining. We talked, looked at photos and just enjoyed each other's company. Hopefully, Judy and John will visit us when they can and see the wonders of Australia.
The end of our vist came around far too soon and Thursday evening the immediate family came around for dinner to enjoy each others company and say our goodbyes - never an easy thing to do, but one we have all learned to cope with over the years. The pain of saying goodbye is far outweighed by the wonderful joy of seeing each other and sharing so many wonderful moments in each others company. We are truly blessed and I know Laraine looks upon her Danish family as her own, with all the love and affection any person can have. Birgith, Josep, Lisa, Angelina, Kenneth, Emilie and Helene we love you all - thank you.